Burn Baby Burn....Kurkure Inferno...

Hello again readers.....
ReaderS ....in the plural ? Well I do like to think more than one person reads this crap that I spew forth, but really.

Anywho I'm sure all of you (There I go again pretending I have multiple readers) have received this chain mail or SMS reading "PLZ DONT EAT "KURKURE" because it contains high amount of "PLASTIC" if you don't believe then burn the "KURKURE" and see the "PLASTIC MELTING" and if you haven't yet received it, you must've been living under a rock and you surely need to get out and make more acquaintances.

First it was the Pepsi has Pesticides bullshit and now this, how stupid can we get. I even had patients asking me if Kurkure has been banned by FDA. Now Im the kind of guy who likes to have a pack of Kurkure with his Pepsi and a can of Pepsi with his pack of Kurkure. (Secret of my Health) And just couldn't have this foolishness flying round. So like the multitude of Kurkure lovers I did the inevitable - Burned a couple of 'em Kurkures to check for plastic (Bloody Waste of Good Food im telling you, but in the name of Science it had to be done.)

Here are my findings---

Yup sure as hell it burns, but I couldn't find any plastic melting nor was there any smell of burning Plastic. But it does burn..... so does it mean it has Plastic ?
Come on now people Kurkure is made of Rice meal, Corn meal, Gram meal (all full of starches) and edible Oil all of it mixed together, homogenized and dehydrated, perfect recipe to burn. Of course it gonna burn like kindling, I mean it would be a wonder if it doesn't catch flame.No ?

You don't need to be a scientist and you don't even need to see the HACCP (Hzard Analysis and Critical Control Point) Certificate which the Kurkure Processing plants in Channo(Punjab), Kolkata and Pune have to figure out that all the stuff thats, well.......inflamable..... burns... and need not have plastic in it.

Heaven only knows how this rumour originated, but the kurkure fire was sure fanned into a blazing inferno by these chain sms and mails.

I believe I have done enough Blah..Blah.. to make me look like a Kurkure salesman here. And let me clarify Kurkure (Frito Lay India ) is not paying me to promote it, though if they decide to.. it would surely be welcome.

So the next time this 'Rishi' heads off to the Himalayas he positively must pack Kurkure packs in the luggage. Its become doubley useful --- set it on fire to keep the cold off or Chomp it up to put the fire in the belly out.

'Cheers

Note -- May God grant peace to the poor kurkures burnt in the name of science.

Ganpati Bappa Morya....'Dr. A' Pudchya Varshi Tari Ya !!!

Visarjan day is here again as Mumbai bids adieu to the Bappa amid the usual "Dhan Dhan" of Pune dhol and Nashik dhol sounds, just a thought is there a Mumbai Dhol ? Well never heard of one.

Each year on this day I used to look forward to going to Chowpatty (FYI Morya it is 5-7 mins walk form my house)just to look at the Humongous Idols in procession. It used to be fun in those days, but with the exponential grown of crowds and Hum..Humm 'Funky ass DJs' and even the 5-7 mins walk to Chowpatty taking more and more time (navigating through the sea of devotees) combined with easy viewing of the same on T.V. Live, going to Chowpatty on this day just lost its appeal. Add to that the bomb scare that happens each year, and me begin out on my luck. I just sit on my lazy, fat ass in front of the TV folding my hands reverently each time a new Ganpati Idol is seen, praying like crazy.

From the year before last (Confirmed) a new routine has been associated with this day -- That of waiting for Dr. A (a.k.a Dhondiram) to show up.

Now though I do know Newtons Law of motion (About the object at rest not moving) but still I home the Procrastinator par excellence will for once show up (Its so much fun for Lazy people like me to call others Procrastinators.)

Each year it starts with his sincierest wishes to visit Chowpatty and go Camera-Happy amongst the Ganapatis.
All the Plan of Attack for the Operation 'Bappa Photo Op' is made ready. Watches are syncronised. Routes commited to memory. The Plans are made about what time to come, how to go about the Ganpati Photo session, what time to return and sleep, how to return home. Or the ETA, NAV points, Tiem to take 5, Egress route and the time to RTB is fixed.
On my part I get my room Ready for him to sleep, get a good menu on the table.
But Alas..................the plan's Visarjan Happens even before Bappa's.

Not that he doesn't want to come the poor fellow, but seems like Bappa wont let him LOL
All those idols posed in vain, Another Ganpati Visarjan Came and went sans a good photographer to snap their photos.

All I can really say is Ganpati Bappa Morya....'Dr. A' Pudchya Varshi Tari Ya !!!

Footnote-- If you are wondering who 'Dr. A' is you need your 'Ears' Checked, or may be You can use your 'Nose' to sniff him out, or just try to use your 'Throat' to call out his name. (Wink.....Wink)


Do Check Out this Cool Video on Ganpati Visarjan

GOOGLE CHROME

When Google released its new (and first) browser a few days ago (Chrome), many praised that move or welcomed this new player into the arena, but many others simply were a bit surprised and wondered if a new browser was really needed when this market already features IE, Firefox, Opera, Safari, Konqueror and a plethora of smaller ones. While IE is still leader, those who aren't satisfied with it have a good choice of alternatives, especially in Firefox and Opera.

Being essentially 'underground' these last few weeks I really missed the Initial Hoopla about Google Chrome. Finally Google with its characteristic word of mouth publicity reached me today, via Dr. A or Dhondiram as he has named himself.
Now being a Anti-IE Firefoxee that I am, I was very curious and just had to try it first hand. And being the 'avid' blogger had to review it.
Got it and Installed and typing this through the Chrome window.

The download and install is quite simple, just download the Google Chrome installer (474 KB).Run it….. Wait for some moments, and you will be prompted to the next installation steps. The installation process was really straight forward. Everyone should be able to do it without problems. Anyway, Google Chrome is only available for Windows XP/Vista right now.

After you have it installed, you are able to download some history, bookmarks and settings from other browser installed. Right now, only Mozilla Firefox and Internet Explorer detected. If you do not want to import any bookmarks/settings, you can skip this step, and start running your newly installed Google Chrome.

Cool and Clean Looks

Where is the window title? Well, this is the first thing I notice when I fired up Google Chrome. The bluish color and the window tabs got my attention after that. And, I like how the tabs are displayed! The window icons look so Vista. There are only some icons in the toolbar, and I think they’re easy to be recognized. By having only some icons and small area in the toolbar, we can have a wider space to browse the websites.

Features

• In this initial release, there are some features offered.
• New Tab
• Application shortcuts
• Dynamic tabs
• Crash control
• Incognito mode
• Safe browsing
• Instant bookmarks
• Importing settings
• Simpler downloads

Go to Google Chrome features page for more details and screencasts. I just hope that they will release more features to make our life happier. :)

Why I won’t use it

Now, coming to the most important part of it all.

Why I’ll never use it ?? It’s because Chrome’s EULA wishes to take anything that I type into my browser window (which would include, ahem, this blog entry, any email I access through the Web and just about anything else involving the Internet) and give it to Google for them to use for any purpose.

From the EULA:

11.1 You retain copyright and any other rights you already hold in Content which you submit, post or display on or through, the Services.

Which earlier read

11.1 You retain copyright and any other rights you already hold in Content which you submit, post or display on or through, the Services. By submitting, posting or displaying the content you give Google a perpetual, irrevocable, worldwide, royalty-free, and non-exclusive license to reproduce, adapt, modify, translate, publish, publicly perform, publicly display and distribute any Content which you submit, post or display on or through, the Services. This license is for the sole purpose of enabling Google to display, distribute and promote the Services and may be revoked for certain Services as defined in the Additional Terms of those Services.

I should note that “Services” is defined as “your use of Google’s products, software, services, and web sites,” but this is, to say the least, disingenuous. Anyone who uses Chrome will technically own the copyright, but who needs copyright when the Chrome user effectively gives up her right to distribute this content in all perpetuity and without royalties?

So if Mr. Pandu is using Chrome and types an email to someone, he “owns” the copyright. But Google has the right to use anything that Ms. Oates types into Chrome for any purpose. And if someone reveals highly personal information through Chrome — like, say, the details of one’s sex life, or some very embarrassing incident — Google has the right to reprint this anywhere. And not only do they get to reprint this content, but they can likewise generate revenue from it. Revenue that should, by all rights, go to the person who authored the content in the first place.

There is no Home Button

Cannot use windows to cascade, or arrange vertically the windows (By clicking taskbar and cascade windows or arrange vertically or arrange horizontally.) Its like Chrome window is not a part of windows at all.

In Conclusion

I know, I haven’t explored Google Chrome deeper, but for the first impression it looks good for internet surfing activity. For basic use, it just works. But, since there are other things that can be done from browsers, bloggers might need more than this. Using Mozilla Firefox, we can extend it by installing some add-ons. I might talk too soon about this since Google Chrome has just released few days ago. If you want to try Google Chrome, just download it right away, and feel the different browsing experience.

I just don’t think I’ll be shifting to Chrome so soon, It’s still ‘JAI FIREFOX’ for me at least.

K Special Hai Bhaya ?

If you watch TV at all, and who doesn't, you've probably seen the commercials for Kellogg's special attempt at a special diet with their famed Special K products. Basically, they claim if you eat two 1 cup bowls of their cereal a day, you will lose six pounds in two weeks.* In short, the program instructs you to start your day with a piece of fruit, a cup of their cereal and skim milk. And then at lunch, you get to do the same thing. And then at dinner, you get to eat normally. Oh, yes, and you get two snacks a day that are Special K branded. Argh! This kind of marketing ploy makes me crazy! Why? Well for one, this is a very unhealthy, unbalanced diet approach. You aren't getting all the nutrients that you need to keep your body functioning properly. This is what you are getting:

• Little to no fiber. Fiber is important in that it makes you feel fuller longer. Further, it prevents or relieve constipation, as well as lowers risk of diabetes and heart disease. Without it, you can experience constipation, infrequent and hard stools and abdominal pains.
• Little to no healthy fat. Why is this a problem? Fat is bad, right? Wrong. Fat is essential for lubricating your joints and manufacturing hormones, and actually making you feel satisfied. Also, healthy fat (unsaturated fats and essential fatty acids) is important in keeping your cholesterol levels in check and your body systems functioning properly.
• High in Saturated fat. Special K non-cereal products tend to be high in saturated fat, which raises LDL, the bad type of cholesterol and therefore increases your risk of heart disease.
• You are getting a lot of sugar. Sugar is an enemy of a healthy diet. It is digested quickly and contains few essential vitamins and minerals.
• You get a decent amount of protein. This is a good thing...but when combined with all of the factors above, it isn't. You need fiber and healthy fat too.

Second, the Special K Diet doesn't teach the consumer (you) what is a healthy diet. It tells you what to do and doesn't explain the importance of a balanced diet and why eating right is the best, long-term strategy for reaching and maintaining a healthy weight. Third, you are consuming a good amount of processed foods throughout the day. Processed foods tend to have tons of additives, preservatives and chemicals...all bad for you. Our bodies are not designed to process these, and as a result, it is detrimental in the long duration. And lastly, well, it is all self-serving and about market share...corporate America finding a way to make more money while sacrificing the third world consumer's best interest...not something I'm all too fond of.

Look, resorting to quick fix strategies, where no thought is involved, is just not sustainable in the long run ...or...in any way. It is more detrimental than anything. If you see a fancy gimmick on TV about losing weight....there is a good chance it is just that...a gimmick.

Anupam Dutta, Managing Director, Kellogg’s India, says, “In today’s fast-paced environment, women are looking for a simple and tasty solution to their weight management concerns. Kellogg’s understands these concerns and for this reason has decided to introduce the new brand.”In fact, Kellogg’s has test-marketed the product in Bangalore to gauge its acceptability and the results were extremely positive.----Wake Up Bangalore !!! Watch out Women !!!

It is priced Rs 45 for a 140 gm pack and Rs 90 for a 290 gm pack. So its rather easy on the pockets, but then again even if its price was pegged to that of gold , the health conscious a.k.a. Dumbasses would still be buying it.


If you want a healthy, multi grain cereal, then opt for something else.
And.. let's be real. If you were to eat a bowl of ANY kind of dry cereal with low-fat milk and fruit for two of your meals per day, you'd lose weight, besides being insanely hungry all day. Cereal alone, especially one serving, is just not complete enough to serve as a meal twice a day.

And as Kellog's themselves say ---------------

* Weight loss may vary. (Oh Yes, that's the bottom Line)

Faarmoolah Of Success !!

If you started reading this expecting to get a Formula, sorry Faarmoola for becoming successful then Stop here and re-read the title. Aw'camon I cant tell how to get successful, im hardly successful myself (Read, Totally unsuccessful lazy slob who spends his time Blogging.)

A few days ago me and some friends (Read ,even bigger and lazier slobs then moi) had got together for Lunch, One of the few times someone else was paying so I had to go no?
Now usually these luncheons are limited to gawking at gals, eating till the esophagus refuses to admit even water, inventing new swear words and oh the most delightfully stupid conversations that if overheard are guaranteed to book us front row center seats at the local Asylum.

No one knows how the conversation turned towards it, mebe it was the lack of gals to gawk at, but the discussion started on, Who can be called successful ? AND How to measure Success ? And everyone looks at me, Ya right !! I'm supposed to answer what even the most powerfully philosophical minds are still grappling with.

So I think as long as the answer is not known, I cant be wrong. So why not try to quantify Success. Can't compare it if it can't be measured no ?

So now what is the cause of 99% (Practically 100%) the problems in the world ? Greed, Power, Poverty, or in one word MONEY. So is the one with more money more successful ???
Hell Yeah !! OF course he is.
Now you can equate success with happiness, and money brings happiness (please don't pretend otherwise, you are just kidding yourself.) And what about health? Well we all know how much money is being spent staying healthy, no doctor treats you for free and you all need to eat right to stay fit.
So we have one variable of the equation right here -- MONEY.

How do you get money ? you work. And work, is called work, cause its work and not play, right ?
We all would love to Play (enjoy) all day and be paid but that dose not happen. We all have to work. And the lesser you work the happier you are (All people who say otherwise can please work on Sundays and public holidays).
So here we get another variable TIME SPENT WORKING.

So then SUCCESS is directly proportional to the amount of MONEY you earn.
and inversely proportional to the TIME SPENT WORKING.

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THE FAARMOOLAH OF SUCCESS (aka SUCCESS QUOTIENT)

(k= The Minimum Amount you need for bare sustenance.)

There we have it, the elusive Faarmoolah is revealed. This Farmoola works on many levels eg. Students can Just substitute Money With Marks and K with passmarks and see for themselves.

Just looking to Answer Life's Big Questions in my own Small way.

So what is your SUCCESS QUOTIENT ???

Heads Up ---- Meter Down !!

Tap.. tap.. tap.. Tippity Tap......... Here is me again tapping away a happy melody on my well worn keyboard, Continuing in the spirit of Righting wrongs (Or bringing them to thy notice in the least.)

Now we all like to get around town but if you are (a) too poor to own a car or (b) just a lazy ass who wont learn to drive Or like me you fit into both the categories....... What are you gonna do but flag down a Cab ? Ya of course there are those red BEST monsters, but traveling in a single decker bus just ain't worth the trouble.

Now you reach your destination (provided you get a cab in the first place) and what do you do ? Ask White or Khaki 'Bhaiya' how much, juggle your wallet till he reverently holds up his tariff card and looks up the fare in a card so tattered and folded so many times that it looks like some parchment from a long forgotten age with a treasure map ? Just pay the amount quoted and Jump out ?

Mostly everyone does. No one bothers to look at the date of the tariff card or even cares to see if its been approved by the RTO or wither its just a cheap fake. That makes the tariff card a real treasure map for the taxi drivers and you a fool. (Ref - A fool and his money are easily parted.)

The Mumbai Regional Transport Office (RTO) had issued new tariff cards for taxis in April 2007. But, till today taxis continue to ply passengers using the old tariff cards. Using the old tariff card is an offence under the Motor Vehicles Act inviting a fine of Rs 500- 2500, along with the suspension of the driver’s license.

“The yellow taxi tariff card was introduced in April 2007 because most of the taxis were converted to compressed natural gas, which is cheaper than petrol. Hence, we reduced the fares by 50p,” says an RTO official.

Inspite of official tariff cards been introduced taxi drivers continue to use the old tariff cards. Most of us are unaware of the fact that we are being looted in broad daylight.

A brief insight into this fraud will show you the actual picture. Mr. Kumar, a taxi driver, upon inquiry explains this fraud, “A minimum distance of 200 kms can fetch me an amount of Rs 100. On an average a cab travels at least 200 - 500 kilometers in a span of eight hours. So using an old tariff card would amount to at least Rs 100-250 per day and Rs 3,000-7,000 per month.” And cheat you out of the same amount.

Earlier the minimum fare was Rs 13 for every 1.6 km and Rs 8.50p for every subsequent kilometer. The new tariff cards have the same minimum fare and for every subsequent kilometer the fare is Rs 8. In other words, if a taxi driver uses the old tariff card for a distance of two kilometer km he earns around 50p and for 10 kilometers around Rs 5. The cumulative money he earns hence depends on the distance traveled.

In order to make sure that you’re not being cheated, remember that an authentic tariff card bears the Regional Transport Authority’s (RTA) stamp along with the chairman’s and the secretary’s signature, one which is pale yellow in color.

What can the layman do in case he finds himself in a situation like this? The RTO official responds, ”If a taxi driver charges a wrong fare, or refuses to take you to your destination, a complaint can be registered against him mentioning his taxi number, the date, time, place, and the nature of the offense at the RTO of his respective area (Tardeo, Wadala or Andheri).
The complaint can even be lodged through our website www.rtomumbaicentral.com.
An independent inquiry will be carried out and if required his license will be suspended.”

Even better would be to print out the RTO tarrif card form the site and carry it in your wallet. http://www.rtomumbaicentral.org/About_Us.aspx

AND PLEASE NOTICE RTO IS NOT WITHOUT ITS FAULTS EITHER --- THE MIDNIGHT FARE FOR METER READING 9.30 SHOWS 1154.50 INSTEAD OF 154.50

Print out your copy and Save your money --- sure, I wouldn't mind receiving a gift out of the savings LOL

Let’s hope the traffic rules are implemented stringently and don’t get stuck in a traffic jam.---Cheers !!

Tropicana Twister Orange Thrill

Hi again, back at my 'adda of solitude', with the rains washing out everywhere else there is no place i'd rather be.

A few weeks ago on 28th June 2008, there was a coupon in most of the leading newspapers in Mumbai giving Tropicana twister Orange thrill , By Pespsico, for Rs. 5/-. Now im no 'Kanjoos' but show me a man not wanting to save money and ill show you a Jackass.

The Coupon

Now I have what can only be called a soft drink tooth, and a soft drink belly to match (I do prefer a soft drink belly agaisnt all the Beer bellies around.) So ,I cut the coupons and looking to save a few Rupees took them to the nearest retailer (Visha Supermarket) but the lil bugger refused the coupons saying 'Stock aya hi nahi hain !' Well Alrighty then I moved on to the next shop But same story there too.

Well I checked quite a few retailers and given my tenacity so save the Rs. 7 and being thirsty I went all the way to Grant Road Station, looking to redeem my coupon and quentch my thrist with the Orangy drink, But there too "Hum coupon nahi lete, and stock nahi hain"

I wonder if there was really no stock or the retailers just didnt want to take the coupons, fearing no reimbursement by Pepsico.

WTF I thought im giving Pepsico a piece of my mind, and send them a fiery mail with address of the retailers not having the stock of their drink. I was majorly pissed off with Pepsico for making me walk so much so get their damned Fruit drink.

Next day i received a phone call from the PRO of pepsico India, the smooth talking sugary lady thanked me profusely for letting them know that the delivery was slow (I don't want your thanks, I just want my drink) she apologized and all (Helloo!!! I don't care for apologies, I want my Twister Bottle for Rs. 5, even if your offer has expired.) The lady was all like sir to show you that we are sorry we will send you a complimentary Crate of The drink (Angry??, im not angry anymore, the only thing better than a damned Twister 250 ml for Rs. 5 is a double damned crate of Twister 350ml for FREE.) Ok is say that's fine, just see to it that next time you give an Advertise your product is actually available in the market.

Now I waited for 3 weeks (that's the standard time for delivery even for parcels coming by post form halfway round the globe) but not a drop of my Drink reached me. What to do, what to do ?

The Coupon incident had already marred my opinion of Pepsico but this was enough for me to start bad mouthing the company and their products. After all its not like I asked for a bloody free crate of the fruit drink, The Pepsico lady promised it to me of her own accord. And hell yeah, I might forget promised by me, but I never forget Promises too me.

If they can be shameless so can I (MBBS does that to people) Another mail degrading the company and its policies shot of my PC, and it sure hit the mark, for here I am typing this post sipping a cool Tropicana Twister Orange Thrill.

It took a month and two angry emails but I sure as hell got My fruity Orangy drink (A crate of 24, 350ml bottles was sent over today)


The Complimentary Crate

And as the coupon says, here I am 'Bheeg Kar Enjoying my 5 rupaye mein TWISTER' for free. The thirst for revenge is over............for now at least.

Note- Next time something like this happens, be sure to tet the offending company know. All it takes is just free email, and some angry words.

I see in 22" wide now !!

Have been using a 19" LCD screen (Viewsonic 1912wb) for quite some time now, and I must say its really great. But the Bigger, Bigger, Faster itch set in again last, It came much earlier than I expected. And back it was to searching reviews, comparing specifications and cost. Came down to Dell SP2208WFP 22" and Viewsonic 22" VX2255WMB. Finally decided on the Viewsonic 22" LCD - VX2255 wmb. Dell lost owing to no the Grey border as opposed to the black border on viewsonic that effectively receded into the backgroung while watching fullscreen videos, and dell has no speakers/mic included.

Got the Viewsonic 22" VX2255WMB screen a week back and it sure is one brilliant pice of tech. In built stereo speakers, microphone, 1.3 Megapixel Webcam, 360 degree rotation, Height Adjustment and Tilt, sure it lacks the pivot to make it verticle but then again who the hell keeps the monitor vertical ???

In a surprising change, Viewsonic has, in a departure from previous models, gone in for an all-glossy look for the VX2255WM. Everything from the bezel to the base and the back area of the monitor, sports the typical piano black gloss finish, which does give it that LCD TV look. This kind of finish, of course leads to the inevitable question… is it a fingerprint magnet? The answer is a resounding YES! Every little smudge stands out sharply, but nothing that a simple wipe wont fix.

The power button is nice and large with a blue (yes blue) power indicator that does look classy. The setting buttons buttons on the VX2255 are places on the Right panel conveniently hidden form view but easy to reach, they are far more usable when compared to previous efforts. They are made of a soft plastic material and register presses quite easily. Shifting through menus is an easy and painless operation.Also included is a 3.5 mm headphone jock.

The base of the monitor, unlike previously, is made of a soft plastic that is surprisingly sturdy and allows very easy movement. The degree of movement is practically 360 degrees. The Height adjustment feature is also smooth, and keeps tightly held at height it is left at. Also at the Back is the nifty cable management feature that holds all'em loose cables perfectly well.

The back of the monitor is unassuming and sports DVI, VGA and webcam connector jacks.

Coming to the added goodies. Another thing this monitor sports over the previous models is the inclusion of a 1.3 MP webcam. Its sensor is surprisingly small but produces usable images.
The Microphone also works without a hitch, but does pick up the background noise a little more than I would like it to. Speakers are hidden facing down, the quality though not very great is sufficient for use with system sounds and basic voice chats.

VX2255 has a native resolution of 1680x1050, response time of 5ms, contrast ratio of 700:1, and a brightness level of 280 cd/m2. So no ghosting problems.

The monitor aced the grayscale tests and there was a dramatic improvement in its black level output with a little tweaking. The contrast / brightness level tests were equally good.
Didn't notice any backlight bleed and there are no dead pixels (My chief concern till I set it up)

It is a excellent monitor for its price 15,250 /- at Lamington Road, offers a good balance of features and is definately one to look for if considering a new Monitor.

The only bad point about it is that now my 19" monitor looks way too small.


Just have a look at
http://www.viewsonic.com/flash/vx2255wmb_sm.htm